DEATH BY POWER POINT: Timeless tips on underwhelming your audience

UNDATED:  Time was when a mediocre PowerPoint presentation didn't hurt you all that much.  After all, had anyone really mastered the enigmatic art of matching thoughts to slides?  And did it really matter, when half your intended audience either wasn't paying attention or didn't bother to show up?  

All that is history now.  Bad presentations aren't just water cooler talk anymore.  They are the butt of jokes in standup comedy routines.  Exhibit A: this all-too-true exposé of how NOT to make your point with PowerPoint.